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Arms folded, Fingers on Lips!
If you haven't done that its not a problem, we're all here today on the 19th day of the month that cunt jesus was born.
For anyone with "learning disabilties" that means a retard to stupid people, ahhh wait nigh im confusin myself. yes yes, as predictable as homeless people it is the weekly
"Funny Fooka"
This week we will be joined by residents of the afterlife, which ciggy plans to eliminate with thracthet c say no more, yes you've guessed it, the bible bashin baby washin fly infested do gooder Mother Theresa, Self acclaimed madman, budd dywer treasurer for the commonwealth of pensylvania, and Overweight Jolly film actor John Candy 
 Roll Title music and credits, ladies and gentlemen welcme to our wekly funny fooka awards here with us tonight we have some very un-important people, so it's important you take time out to laff at them cos ghosts dont exist and they can do fuck all. back to this evenings events its never easy choosing a funny fooka, infact its far from it, our judges have been delegating for literally seconds and we've came up with 3 names, Farroq, Bradshaw, AND..............Lester piggott,
Drum roll please, over to john theresa and budd, (john) thank you my friend, it's an honour to be here as i'm dead, so i'd like to take time, to thank everyone who helped me in my (BANG) (theresa) oh Sh*^*^t budd's shot himself, get up ya dick we gotta show to do, ahh fuck this im away.............
(john) we'll anyway this weeks winner is lester piggott. thanks for joinin us in this holy service of matrimony*
*holy, service, matrimony, are words under EU laws and can only be used by us the onion rings, Shhhhh (theyre watching)
 Lester Piggott, known in the world of horse racing, or is that racing horses, i dunno, but here we have a man capible of makin an animal run at up to speeds of 60MPH for fuk all i mean come on, where does this guy get off, and for any family members of lester piggott, for the small price of £19.99 you can get a comemorative set of 4 toilet rolls with lesters face on each sheet of toilet roll. each pack contains four rolls, with approx. 12 sheets per roll, pack must not be sold indiviadually or to black people.
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